Coping at Christmas

The Christmas holidays are fast approaching. Alongside the traditional fun and festivities, for some people the Christmas period can also bring about feelings of loneliness and isolation.

Loneliness can affect anyone at any time and Christmas can often be especially difficult, for a variety of reasons. Financial pressures, work stress, family tensions, grief, separation and divorce are all key factors in feeling low and alone.

STRESS

Christmas doesn’t have to be picture perfect but it’s easy to feel overloaded by the extra work that comes at this time of year – buying gifts, entertaining, decorating and cleaning the house for visitors. The list of tasks can be overwhelming. This year, concerns about cost of living are high on the agenda. Worrying about family dynamics and time pressures can be draining too.

It’s important to recognise the signs of stress as soon as possible. According to the NHS you might:

• feel overwhelmed

• have racing thoughts or difficulty concentrating

• be irritable

• feel constantly worried, anxious or scared

• feel a lack of self-confidence

• have trouble sleeping or feel tired all the time

• avoid things or people you are having problems with

• be eating more or less than usual

• drink or smoke more than usual.

If you think you are stressed, support is available, either from Open Door, or from other services. Talking your problems over can help sort through and calm your feelings of stress.

loneliness

Loneliness can be triggered by a life event or change in situation, or by nothing at all. Feeling lonely at Christmas is compounded by the idea that Christmas is a time for celebrating together. We all experience loneliness in different ways and not everyone has a network of support available.

The NHS campaign Better Health: Every Mind Matters shares advice to help combat loneliness.

Evidence suggests that talking openly about loneliness with those around you can help you feel less isolated. Reach out to friends and family – you might be surprised that others around you feel the same way. Join a local community group or volunteering network to get you out of the house. Sharing the load can often help ease the burden.

Every Mind Matters ‘top tips’ for overcoming loneliness include:

• Keep in touch with those around you

• Join a group

• Do things you enjoy

• Share your feelings – but don’t compare yourself to others

• Help someone else feel connected (including by volunteering)

Urgent support is available from a range of services. You can reach out for help at any time of the year if you’re feeling overwhelmed.

Manage expectations

Social pressures, exacerbated by social media trends and aspirational advertising campaigns can lure us into thinking we need to create the ‘perfect Christmas’ but, for many, Christmas can be a time of worry, financial strain and isolation.

Letting other people know how you want to enjoy the festivities can help set boundaries and ensure Christmas is a happy time for all involved.

The Mental Health Foundation offers advice on managing expectations this Christmas, including:

• Let others know what your feelings and expectations are

• Try to get some balance between your social obligations and what you want to do for yourself

• Remind yourself that not everything ‘needs’ to happen over the festive period

• There's nothing wrong with saying 'no', but be sensitive to others at the same time

• It's also a time to look after your well-being, so prioritise it

• You'll need time for yourself. Don't be afraid to remind people. They'll understand and probably feel the same way.

we are here for you

Throughout the year, there are times in all our lives that we struggle, feel depressed, sad, anxious or lonely, or just feel we would benefit from talking things through.

At Open Door we provide a professional, warm, and welcoming environment. Together with your counsellor you will have the time and space to express your thoughts and feelings.

• Counselling for children and young people: Our specialist children and young people’s counselling is available for children over 5 years old. Parents or guardians can use our referral form or get in touch to find out more.

• Counselling for adults: Over 18s can self-refer to our counselling services using our online form.